Comments for American Trans Man http://americantransman.com Trans stuff, science stuff, a transmasculine perspective Sat, 26 May 2012 02:07:11 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.com/ Comment on 14 Reasons Why It’s Not Okay to Out Someone as Trans – A Public Service Announcement From Your Friendly, Neighborhood Trans Person by americantransman http://americantransman.com/2012/04/18/14-reasons-why-its-not-okay-to-out-someone-as-trans-a-public-service-announcement-from-your-friendly-neighborhood-trans-person/#comment-1926 Sat, 26 May 2012 02:07:11 +0000 http://americantransman.com/?p=5492#comment-1926 Possibly. Or perhaps she’s just a thoughtful, supportive friend :)
Either way, she sounds like she’s a keeper!

]]> Comment on 14 Reasons Why It’s Not Okay to Out Someone as Trans – A Public Service Announcement From Your Friendly, Neighborhood Trans Person by storiesaboutfreeingthisboy http://americantransman.com/2012/04/18/14-reasons-why-its-not-okay-to-out-someone-as-trans-a-public-service-announcement-from-your-friendly-neighborhood-trans-person/#comment-1922 Fri, 25 May 2012 16:23:15 +0000 http://americantransman.com/?p=5492#comment-1922 one friend of mine recently asked for my permission for her to correct some people who would refer me as my mom’s daughter. she would say that i’m my mom’s son and end of discussion; leaving them to ask me questions. i gave her the permission and felt respected! i wonder if she have read this blog…

]]> Comment on 14 Reasons Why It’s Not Okay to Out Someone as Trans – A Public Service Announcement From Your Friendly, Neighborhood Trans Person by americantransman http://americantransman.com/2012/04/18/14-reasons-why-its-not-okay-to-out-someone-as-trans-a-public-service-announcement-from-your-friendly-neighborhood-trans-person/#comment-1909 Thu, 24 May 2012 01:53:41 +0000 http://americantransman.com/?p=5492#comment-1909 Cool. Thanks.

]]> Comment on 14 Reasons Why It’s Not Okay to Out Someone as Trans – A Public Service Announcement From Your Friendly, Neighborhood Trans Person by Tree http://americantransman.com/2012/04/18/14-reasons-why-its-not-okay-to-out-someone-as-trans-a-public-service-announcement-from-your-friendly-neighborhood-trans-person/#comment-1908 Wed, 23 May 2012 16:54:52 +0000 http://americantransman.com/?p=5492#comment-1908 I am a part of a group called Project Embrace SA-we advocate for LGBT youth in the foster care/adoption system by providing this type information to people involved with these youths! I am passing this on to our training coordinator (of course giving you due props)!

Keep on writing …

Tree

]]> Comment on 14 Reasons Why It’s Not Okay to Out Someone as Trans – A Public Service Announcement From Your Friendly, Neighborhood Trans Person by americantransman http://americantransman.com/2012/04/18/14-reasons-why-its-not-okay-to-out-someone-as-trans-a-public-service-announcement-from-your-friendly-neighborhood-trans-person/#comment-1905 Wed, 23 May 2012 12:16:04 +0000 http://americantransman.com/?p=5492#comment-1905 Sorry, that probably came off as flippant and that’s not my intention.

But truly, I do not see how I represent being trans as an horrific thing, keeping in mind that you, yourself, have agreed that these reasons are legitimate, and I don’t see how I am implying that everyone should want to hide being trans. My post is not about being stealth or being in the closet. In fact, I mention several times in the post about trans people being ‘out.’ My post is about common courtesy and respect of not outing a trans person without their permission and why.

And, as I mentioned before, I stated at the beginning of my post that I don’t speak for all trans people, I stated at the end that some people will not agree, and I tried my best to not speak in absolutes, inserting caveats like, “some people” or “may” or “might” throughout the reasons. I revised one reason because of your comment, but I’m not sure what else exactly you expect me to do or say. The fact that my blog post has been re-posted on a bunch of Tumblr accounts and other blogs is something I did not foresee and was surprised by, to be honest. What that says to me, however, is that people agree with what I’ve written, and although I am not speaking for you or anyone else, perhaps these folks on Tumblr and elsewhere are using my words to help them speak for themselves.

]]> Comment on 14 Reasons Why It’s Not Okay to Out Someone as Trans – A Public Service Announcement From Your Friendly, Neighborhood Trans Person by americantransman http://americantransman.com/2012/04/18/14-reasons-why-its-not-okay-to-out-someone-as-trans-a-public-service-announcement-from-your-friendly-neighborhood-trans-person/#comment-1904 Wed, 23 May 2012 11:08:37 +0000 http://americantransman.com/?p=5492#comment-1904 “I should also mention that pretty much everything you’ll read here is my opinion and I do not speak for all trans people.”

]]> Comment on 14 Reasons Why It’s Not Okay to Out Someone as Trans – A Public Service Announcement From Your Friendly, Neighborhood Trans Person by Alex http://americantransman.com/2012/04/18/14-reasons-why-its-not-okay-to-out-someone-as-trans-a-public-service-announcement-from-your-friendly-neighborhood-trans-person/#comment-1903 Wed, 23 May 2012 10:07:57 +0000 http://americantransman.com/?p=5492#comment-1903 Alright mate, calm down. Then everything I think is just MY opinion and in my opinion you are representing being trans as this horrific thing that everyone should want to hide. I have been in the trans community long enough to know that these are legitimate reasons, thank you VERY much, please do not patronise my experience. You don’t know what I’ve been through or what I feel about being trans and to be honest it doesn’t matter to this discussion. What matters to me is that your blog represents these reasons as gospel and I see your blog post all over everyone’s tumblr so evidently everyone’s reading it and it bothers me that potentially people who don’t know as much as I and perhaps you (I know nothing about your life) do about being trans will be interpreting this as the way everybody feels.

]]> Comment on 14 Reasons Why It’s Not Okay to Out Someone as Trans – A Public Service Announcement From Your Friendly, Neighborhood Trans Person by americantransman http://americantransman.com/2012/04/18/14-reasons-why-its-not-okay-to-out-someone-as-trans-a-public-service-announcement-from-your-friendly-neighborhood-trans-person/#comment-1900 Wed, 23 May 2012 02:20:34 +0000 http://americantransman.com/?p=5492#comment-1900 Dude, my post has nothing to do with being stealth. I am out, I’m not stealth, but I still don’t want people outing me without my permission. I want to choose who learns my private information and and I don’t want someone else making that decision for me. If you don’t give a damn if someone outs you without your permission, fine, but I am not of that opinion and neither are a bunch of other trans folks, which should be pretty obvious from the comments on this blog post.

And if the reasons I give here as to why people shouldn’t out us as trans don’t matter to you, that doesn’t mean that they’re not legitimate reasons. It only means that you don’t care whether people respect them.

As for making it clear that I am not speaking for every trans person,right above Reason #1 I wrote:

“I should also mention that pretty much everything you’ll read here is my opinion and I do not speak for all trans people.”

I don’t think I can be any clearer than that.

]]> Comment on 14 Reasons Why It’s Not Okay to Out Someone as Trans – A Public Service Announcement From Your Friendly, Neighborhood Trans Person by Alex http://americantransman.com/2012/04/18/14-reasons-why-its-not-okay-to-out-someone-as-trans-a-public-service-announcement-from-your-friendly-neighborhood-trans-person/#comment-1895 Tue, 22 May 2012 12:50:13 +0000 http://americantransman.com/?p=5492#comment-1895 Thank you for your civil response and I appreciate the edits that you have made. I personally feel that while I may have misinterpreted your intended meaning, that is not through any fault of mine but rather because of the fact that I don’t think you make it as clear as you think you do that you are not talking about every trans person. The very title of this – “14 Reasons Why It’s Not Ok To Out Someone As Trans” – does not make this clear! It is not called “14 Reasons Why It’s Not Ok To Out A Stealth Trans Person” and I feel that this mood is reflected throughout the rest of the post.
My comment on the unmatch-making was based especially on this point: “Perhaps you think that the trans person’s body might not be what the other person expects, but unless you have seen the trans person naked, you do not know what their body looks like, and even if you have, how can you know with certainty that the potential suitor won’t find their body appealing?” I think ultimately telling somebody that someone is trans is not necessarily about whether you think that this potential lover will be repulsed or not, it’s about them just knowing that this person is a transman or transwoman, not a cis man or woman. So whether or not the potential lover finds it appealing isn’t an issue – they can’t make up their mind either way if they aren’t told you’re trans. But I appreciate your point that much like any medical information it is the trans person’s business to mention in their own time, as, for all the person who does the telling knows, the trans person was going to mention it soon. However, I think it’s something which is going to have to come up either way and to be honest it doesn’t make any difference to me if a friend tells someone I’m considering dating I’m trans, just in the interest of telling them stuff about me, and they get a negative reaction or I tell that person and I get a negative reaction – either way I now no longer want to date that person. Equally well, it doesn’t bother me if a friend or I receive a positive reaction – either way, then I’ll know that person is still a potential dating candidate. If they’re a transphobe, you’re going to find out sooner or later and then if you’re smart cross them the hell off your list of possible partners…

]]> Comment on 14 Reasons Why It’s Not Okay to Out Someone as Trans – A Public Service Announcement From Your Friendly, Neighborhood Trans Person by americantransman http://americantransman.com/2012/04/18/14-reasons-why-its-not-okay-to-out-someone-as-trans-a-public-service-announcement-from-your-friendly-neighborhood-trans-person/#comment-1894 Tue, 22 May 2012 11:54:32 +0000 http://americantransman.com/?p=5492#comment-1894 Hi again Alex. I gave this some more thought after sleeping on it and went back and changed the point about people with trans attractions. Rather than presume that people are going to read Matt Kailey’s posts on the subject, I decided to make my point more balanced and mention that some trans people like to date non-trans people with trans attractions. Thanks again for your comments.

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